After a certain point in a movie’s prolonged development cycle, you must wonder whether it’s worth it to keep going. Should you cut your losses to avoid being responsible for the creation of what could potentially be one of the worst movies of all time or continue to create something that may be fantastic? In the case of Borderlands (2024), which has been in different phases of development since 2009, the producers involved in this unequivocal disaster should’ve done audiences a favor and quit while they were 15 years behind.

Borderlands’ core plight is that it is nowhere near as relevant as it might’ve been when it was pitched years ago. Based on a video game franchise whose popularity and cultural impact peaked from 2012 to 2014 with the releases of widely acclaimed entries Borderlands 2 (2012) and Tales From the Borderlands (2014), so much has changed in the video game and movie industries. At one point in time, Borderlands was viewed as innovative and original, two pivotal aspects that make or break big-budget studio blockbusters. Today, as the movie whose storied development was referenced in a game back in 2013 is finally released, the film is derivative and completely lacking in originality.

Directed by Eli Roth and partially by Deadpool’s (2016) helmer Tim Miller, Borderlands tells a tale of a ragtag group of misfits that feels all too familiar. Once weapons tycoon Atlas (Édgar Ramírez) hires bounty hunter Lillith (Cate Blanchett) to track down and return his daughter Tina (Ariana Greenblatt), Lilith takes off to Pandora. Pandora is a planet that can best be described as the Wasteland from the Mad Max (1979-2024) franchise if, in addition to car-crazy psychopaths, its inhabitants include alien wildlife.

With the help of Claptrap (Jack Black), a robot whose sole purpose is to aid Lillith in her journey even if it’s against his own will, Lilith quickly tracks down Tina. To her surprise and aggravation, Tina is in no rush to leave as she’s being protected from her father, who only seeks to exploit her for his nefarious motivations. Her protectors consist of soldier Roland (Kevin Hart) and raging psychopath Krieg (Florian Munteanu). 

As soon as the group decides to work together, the movie morphs into a Guardians of the Galaxy (2014) carbon copy, which holds it back. The movie doesn’t even try to hide that it’s copying James Gunn’s homework. Each team member can be directly compared to a member of Marvel’s Guardians, and the predictable story roughly follows the core structure of Gunn’s film. Instead of racing against villains to harbor an infinity stone, the Borderlands oddballs are harboring keys to a mythical Vault that holds the secrets to the universe and untold riches. The story of Borderlands even takes its crew to a seedy city where the scenery is as if Knowhere from Guardians lacked any personality whatsoever. There, they meet Dr. Patricia Tannis (Jamie Lee Curtis), a collector of knowledge who tells them about the MacGuffins they carry.

For years, different studios have tried to create their own Guardians of the Galaxy. Warner Brothers hired Gunn to develop The Suicide Squad (2021) for DC. Paramount applied the Guardians formula of assembling a group of loveable outlaws and scoundrels to go on a heroic adventure of fantastic proportions to its Dungeons & Dragons (2023) film. Now, Lionsgate figures it would have its turn in the spotlight with Borderlands. They just didn’t realize that they took all the wrong lessons from the success of the other studios. Lionsgate focused so much on trying to have its own Guardians of the Galaxy franchise that it completely forgot it could have its own Borderlands franchise. 

If only the creatives behind this film had looked at the compelling lore and storytelling found in entries to the game series like Tales From the Borderlands, perhaps this adaptation could’ve come close to matching the remarkable character work, humor, and drama in that narrative-focused game. Rather, it feels like Roth actively tried to set the story he tells in his film apart from any of the pre-established stories told in the games, a mistake that video game adaptations have made time and time again. If he had instead embraced the original storylines, general audiences unfamiliar with the video games could have found something original to embrace in a story worth telling. 

Audiences aren’t interested in watching lazily constructed retreads of stories they’ve seen told better elsewhere. Borderlands could’ve given them something unique in the sci-fi/action/fantasy drama, but the film almost feels too ashamed to embrace its roots to deliver on its potential.

The Borderlands series is packed with layered characters that go to waste in this film. The characters that the movie does try to stay faithful towards only come across as painfully exasperating. No character demonstrates this more than Claptrap. Claptrap plays so well in the games because of the genius voice work that artist David Eddings imbues into the role. In the games, Claptrap gets dangerously close to annoying, but Eddings’ voice and the R-rated writing make the character consistently hilarious. In the movie, Black is attempting his best Eddings impression while working with a PG-13 script that feels like it’s written by a 14-year-old Redditor. Fans of the source material may respect what Black is trying to do by staying faithful to Eddings’ unique voice, but everyone else will want to cry out in agony every time he utters lines that feel like they’re being read by nails in a blender.

While Black at least tries to give a serviceable performance, everyone else feels like they’re phoning it in over a Zoom call on a Monday. Setting aside how no one in this cast has a shred of chemistry with each other, they all feel like they don’t want to be there (which very well could be true). Blanchett has stated that she decided to be in the movie because she was bored during the COVID-19 pandemic. Unfortunately, this movie was filmed before Tár (2022), a film that landed her an Academy Award nomination. Otherwise, she could’ve seen for herself the hilarious irony of how she morphed into Lydia Tár, who, at the end of the film, is stuck working on a video game project that is beneath her.

Curtis may be the only one who thought they were in a decent movie while filming. Although her performance is less phoned in than everyone else who isn’t voicing a CGI character, she still feels out of place due to the severe lack of chemistry with her co-stars. That includes Hart, who is uncharacteristically uncharismatic due to the thin writing of his character.

Borderlands disappoints most in its action setpieces, which are as uninventive as they come. The games are known for their balls-to-the-wall action that capitalizes on distinct weapons that feel like they were thought up by children doodling in notebooks. Whether it’s a gun that shoots other guns, a gun that shoots cheeseburgers, or a gun that shoots feces, if you can think of it, it’s likely in the Borderlands games somewhere. That isn’t the case for the movie, which decides to showcase action that not only feels uninspired but turns up its nose at anything that could be exciting to watch. 

Every set piece consists of characters blindly shooting normal guns at hordes of enemies while taking cover behind a wall in an environment that looks like it could have been generated in a video game from 2009. It’s all eye-rollingly dizzying if you put a shred of effort into following it, and these moments that should be the movie’s calling card lack the brutality found in the games.

Borderlands is garbage that tries hard to pretend it’s, at the very least, a fast food meal. It’s a wretched example of everything that could go wrong when a studio tries to haphazardly copy popular trends without advancing them with originality and a disgrace to fans of the source material. 

Review Courtesy of Evan Miller

Feature Image Credit to Lionsgate via Engadget.